In 2012, Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard partnered to release a homage to the horror genre, combining elements of several horror cliche’s, cult movies, and cosmic horror. Cabin in the Woods featured an often used trope of four teenagers, each representing a particular “class” of horror movie characters, i.e., the athlete, the fool, the virgin, the scholar, and the harlot, traveling to a rundown cabin in the middle of nowhere. When there, the teenagers released an ancient horror, needing to kill to keep the “Ancient One’s” at bay. The Ancient Ones, inspired by Lovecraftian horrors, if not satisfied, will destroy the world. The rituals, of which only one must succeed, sprawls across the globe. The best twist of this particular movie is that the agency in charge of the ritual provides several artifacts allowing the teenagers to choose their demise. Throughout the movie, you get a quick glimpse of the “whiteboard” denoting the categories of the “champions” of evil and each stored in a cube. the “champions” are heavily inspired by the horror movie genre. In all, 32 monsters are named. So, in order to allow us to delve in the full breadth of the horror movie genre, we take the whiteboard list, write each category on a small piece of paper, and draw that movies “category”. We began this “ritual” last year, going through 28 of the 32 categories. So, far we have made it over half way. Here is the categories and the movies we have watched so far. Please note, for overall ratings, movies are divided into three categories: category 1 is movies that are really good but not really rewatchable, i.e., great to watch once; category 2a are good and category 2b are bad movies that are easy to watch over and over again, i.e., 2b can also be described as “so bad its good”; category 3 movies are absolutely awful movies that should not ever by watched.

1. Bigfoot/Yeti/Wendigo — Fear Itself: Episode “Skin and Bones” (2008)

Cabin in the Woods group three distinct creatures into a single category. A bigfoot is a North American ancient man-ape that roams the Pacific Northwest. The yeti is an apelike creature that lives in the inhospitable reaches of the high altitude of the Himalayas. Lastly, a wendigo is an ancient North American monster of malevolent spirit that terrorizes the unfortunate during the coldest winter days.

“Fear Itself: Skin and Bones” represented the wendigo as the evil spirit, inhabiting desperate men. “Fear Itself” is not a movie, but a show that aired on NBC from 2008 to 2009. The criminally underrated, unnatural Doug Jones starred as the titular wendigo. Originally a loving husband and father, he quickly became possessed, seeking to consume the flesh of his family. Doug Jones makes a believable Wendigo, with his unnaturally long limbs and strained neck. The episode is rated TV-14 and is easily a good family feature.

Sexual Content: 0/5	Violence/Gore: 3/5	Profanity: 1/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 2/5	Overall: Category 2b

2. Kevin — Psycho (1960)

Who is Kevin? Kevin is a normal guy that happens to be a serial killer. In this genre, art imitates life presenting a scenario where an unassuming, average joe turns out to be a cold blooded killer. John Wayne Gacy, Jeffrey Dahmer, and so on. Serial killers look like us, look approachable, safe, and normal. So, out of all other categories, this one brings the greatest sense of unease, having you looking at all the average joe’s in your life wondering if they have a dark secret. Probably the famous Kevin is Norman Bates from Alfred Hitchcock’s 1960 classic Psycho. True to the genre, the movie does not start out as a “slasher film”, rather featuring a woman on the run. Unfortunately, her fate was sealed when she took the wrong turn and ended up staying the night at the Bates Motel. Her shower screams and classic movie score are recognizable for those never even seeing the movie. And, as the movie fades to black, Norman’s cold stare and wry smile still unsettles the most hardcore horror aficionado. The move, though coming out during the Hays Code era, pushed the envelope of acceptable conduct and, even today garners an R Rating, though a very mild R.

Sexual Content: 1/5	Violence/Gore: 2/5	Profanity: 1/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 2/5	Overall: Category 2a

3. Scarecrow — Husk (2011)

The scarecrow is synonymous with fall and, by extension, the Halloween holiday. So, extending the scarecrow to a horror icon is a logical step. This year, we watched the 2011 movie Husk. Husk is not a great movie. It features the horror trope of a group of young friends becoming stranded in rural America, finding a rundown farm house, only to be hunted by an evil spirit possessing various scarecrows around the grounds. The universe’s rules are inconsistently applied and the characters quit using logic as they go from one set piece to the next. The movie is Rated R and ended up being more infuriating than entertaining. This one can definitely be skipped.

Sexual Content: 0/5	Violence/Gore: 3/5	Profanity: 2/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 3/5	Category: 3

4. Angry Molesting Trees — The Evil Dead (1981)

There is only one angry molesting trees: The Evil Dead. The 1981 Sam Raimi Classic features a demonic tree that has its way with an unfortunate female actress. The particular scene is not too graphic but the movie overall is a comically bloody good time. The movie is rated NC-17 and is the cult classic. Other movies, including Cabin in the Woods, will mimic the group of young fans traveling to a derelict cabin in the middle of nowhere only to be murdered by malevolent forces. The Youtube channel GoodBadFlicks provides excellent insight into the making of and cultural significance of this particular movie. If you do not want to stomach the cult classic, I suggest watching the exploring video.

Sexual Content: 4/5	Violence/Gore: 5/5	Profanity: 2/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 5/5	Category: 2a

5. The Huron — Brotherhood of the Wolf (2001)

The Huron is the “Native” trope. The trope can largely be summarized as the “uncivilized” native population savagely attacks and murders the more “civilized” westerners. The classic John Wayne Westerns almost always depicted the outdated, racist trope. But, some movies took this trope a bit further trying to make an actual horror icon. But, for our purposes we chose 2001 French film Brotherhood of the Wolf. The movie starred Mark Dacascos as Mani, the last surviving member of his band of the Iroquois tribe. He accompanies his friend to the French countryside in search of the real-life-inspired Beast of Gevaudan. He kicks the asses of several cult members and bad guys. Of note, Mark Decascos grew up in Hawaii but his ancestry is actually Irish, Japanese, and Filipino. He is a renowned martial artist and this is likely why he played a Native American — he can convincingly kick ass and at least look Native? Overall, the movie is rated R and is enjoyable given its real life inspiration. But, due to the long runtime (144 minutes!!!), its hard to rewatch.

Sexual Content: 4/5	Violence/Gore: 4/5	Profanity: 0/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 3/5	Category: 1

6. Hell Lord — Little Nicky (2000)

The Hell Lord from Cabin in the Woods is heavily inspired by the Cenobites from Clive Barker’s 1986 horror classic Hellraiser. In fact, the Hell Lord’s name is cited as Fornicus, with saw blades in his head instead of nails. But, the original hell lord is Satan. So, in order to expand this category, we chose to watch Little Nicky, the 2000 Adam Sandler movie starring him as the titular Nicky, being half angel and half demon. Harvey Keitel stars as the dark lord. Though not a typical Halloween movie, it provides a more family-friendly feature, largely free from the general terror and gruesome gore of most Halloween classics. The movie is PG-13 but most of the “adult” humor easily flies over the heads of younger children.

Sexual Content: 3/5	Violence/Gore: 2/5	Profanity: 2/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 2/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 1/5	Category: 2b

7. Jack-o-Lantern — The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)

The Jack-o-Lantern may be the “Christmas Tree” of Halloween. Other than trick-r-treating, children’s fondest memories of Halloween is carving the family Jack-o-Lantern. This year, we paid homage to the Jack-o-Lantern by watching the the Pumpkin King himself, Jack Skellington in the 1993 Halloween classic, The Nightmare Before Christmas. Directed by Henry Selick. Presented by Tim Burton, The Nightmare Before Christmas fits nicely into both holidays. The time period actually takes place in the days between Halloween and Christmas, concluding on Christmas Eve. But, the general atmosphere makes this a Halloween movie in our book. Rated PG, this is a great Halloween movie for the entire family.

Sexual Content: 0/5	Violence/Gore: 1/5	Profanity: 0/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 1/5	Category: 2a

8. Merman — Dagon (2001)

The Merman is the male version of the mermaid. Half-man, half-fish, this monster in Cabin in the Woods crawls after its prey on land before mauling the poor victim. There are several “horror” versions of mer-people, including the classic Creature from the Black Lagoon. This year, we watch Dagon, a 2001 Spanish film loosely based upon the H.P. Lovecraft short story. In the Lovecraftian lore, the Dagon is an ancient god, based upon the ancient Mesopotamian god by the same name. The human characters are stalked by the merman living in a quiet Spanish village. The movie takes many liberties with the source material. But, for a horror film based on merman, this movie is quite solid. The film is rated R.

Sexual Content: 3/5	Violence/Gore: 4/5	Profanity: 3/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 4/5	Category: 2b

9. Zombie Redneck Torture Family — House of 1,000 Corpses (2003)

The Zombie Redneck Torture Family don’t actually have to be zombies. Instead, to qualify, we just need a family of indiscriminate murderers. Leatherface and his siblings qualify. Also, the “hill folk” from the Hills Have Eyes. However, this year, we watched the 2003 cult class House of 1000 Corpses. The Rated R film features the Firefly family furthering the work of Dr. Satan. Sid Haig, described as the unsung hero of exploitation, really steals this movie with his Captain Spaulding. Rob Zombie has since distanced himself from the movie, describing it as a “calamitous mess”. Though, it is largely the best film his has made to date. No other film has the same cult attraction or staying power.

Sexual Content: 3/5	Violence/Gore: 5/5	Profanity: 5/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 5/5	Category: 2a

10. Reptilius — Notzilla (2019)

The Reptilius is inspired by reptile monsters. We drew Reptilius for our “Tubi Tuesday Feature.” The Third Tuesday of each month is “Tubi Tuesday.” The goal of Tubi Tuesday is to watch a lower rated movie from the Tubi app. So, we chose to watch the unrated mess, with a 4.7/10 rating, 2019 giant reptile movie, Notzilla. Though billed as horror comedy, the movie lacked neither, trying too hard to be funny and forwarding no effort to be scary. Notzilla is not good. As the name suggests, it is a Godzilla clone, poking fun at the low effort effects. Though the cast did their best, the jokes were flat and a 20 to 30 minute skit was stretched to 78 minutes, losing much of the charm it likely would have had in a shorter format. The movie, if rated, would likely garner a PG rating.

Sexual Content: 1/5	Violence/Gore: 1/5	Profanity: 1/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 2/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 0/5	Category: 3

11. Zombies — Resident Evil (2002)

Zombies need no introduction. Zombies, the undead, walking again to prey on the brains of the living, may be the most iconic and beloved of all movie monsters. With a plethora of movies to choose from, we settled on the 2002 action horror Milla Jovovich film, Resident Evil. The movie spawned a franchise. And, arguably, the franchise moves ever increasingly into the ridiculous, the first film did not try to be more than what it was intended: a loosely based video game adaption. The film has plenty of actions ,stakes, etc., to keep it engaging and the cast is pretty solid. Rated R, this film is not the best zombie movie you could watch. But, it is definitely a zombie movie you will watch.

Sexual Content: 3/5	Violence/Gore: 4/5	Profanity: 4/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 0/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 3/5	Category: 2a

12. Dismemberment Goblins — Troll (1986)

The dismemberment goblins are any number of small, mischievous, murderous imp-like creatures akin to the Ghoulies, Gremlins, or Critters. This year, we watched the often forgotten 1986 film, Troll. Troll features a Troll converting an apartment complex of eccentric characters into mystical creatures. Eventually, a witch, who also resides in the apartment complex, teams up with Atreyu to defeat the Troll. I think, of interesting note, this PG-13 film may even be a sequel to the Harry Potter franchise.

Sexual Content: 1/5	Violence/Gore: 2/5	Profanity: 2/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 3/5	Category: 2b

13. Sugarplum Fairy — Pan’s Labyrinth (2006)

The sugarplum fairy is the most enigmatic of all the Cabin in the Woods Creatures and maybe the most deserving of her own film. In the film, she is seen as a petite ballerina. Her face is featureless except for several conical rows of teeth, leading ever down a dark abyss of her throat. Based upon exhaustive research, the inspiration of this creature is not readily apparent other than a combination of the “toothy” monsters, fairies, and the imagination of creature design. So, we watched the 2006 Spanish film Pan’s Labyrinth. Rated R, the film does feature fairies aiding our young heroine through the labyrinth. But, it is Doug Jones (again) as Pale Man that instills nightmares, even in adults. Our children affectionally call him Mr. Handy due to his eyes appearing on his palms, his inhuman walk, gaze, and guttural bleats sets a frightful atmosphere as he slowly stalks — and bites off the heads of two fairies — our heroine. Though only featured for minutes, the Pale Man is what the movie is best known for. Rated R, this movie maybe one of the most terrifying due to its realistic subject matter.

Sexual Content: 0/5	Violence/Gore: 5/5	Profanity: 3/5
Alcohol/Drug Use: 2/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 5/5	Category: 2a

14. Clowns — Terrifier (2016)

The evil clown trope spawns both fantasy and reality. Famed serial killer, John Wayne Gacy dressed as a clown. In addition, the fear of clowns, coulrophobia, is well-known. Lastly, several classic horror movies, like Pennywise the Dancing Clown, or the Killer Klowns from Outerspace are cemented not only in pop culture but synonymous with Halloween.

Art the Clown may be the greatest modern slasher villain. He first appeared in the 2013 anthology feature All Hallows Eve. In 2016, he received his first solo film, Terrifier. He also has two sequels, Terrifier 2 and, this year, Terrifier 3. Art is somewhat unique regarding his origins. Similar to Otis from House of 1,000 Corpses or Leatherface from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre franchise, Art kills, as sadistically as possible, for no other reason other than to kill. In addition, his physical appearance and black and white palette create immediate unease, bordering on fear. Though a slasher barely 11 years old, he deserves to be in the company of the slasher classics like Jason, Freddy, and Leatherface. In fact, I’d rather faceoff with the classics of the past versus risking my chance in a game with Art. Terrifier is “unrated” but, if rated, would easily earn an NC-17 rating for the sheer amount of violence of gore. This is a “midnight movie” best saved for when the moral center, i.e., mom, is fast asleep.

Sexual Conduct: 3/5	Violence/Gore: 5/5	Profanity: 4/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 5/5	Overall: Category 2a

15. Sexy Witches — The Craft (1996)

Sexy witches is almost synonymous with all mainstream-movie witches. Sarah Jessica Parker in Hocus Pocus, Nicole Kidman and Sandra Bullock in Practical Magic, or even Helen Mirren in Excalibur, a movie watcher has almost an endless selection to choose from. Four our purpose, we watched the 1996 teenage-girl cult classic, The Craft. the movie stars four femme fatales as high school students at a Catholic school — mostly dressed in a catholic school girl skirt and knee high stockings. Though not explicitly “sexy” and quite tame from where the movie could have been, it is definitely a product of the 90’s. The movie does start slow and finishes strong, even if too abruptly. It would be interesting to see a more adult version of this movie where Fairuza Balk’s Nancy recruits a new coven of high school witches. The movie is a rated R.

Sexual Conduct: 1/5	Violence/Gore: 2/5	Profanity: 2/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 3/5	Category: 2a

16. The Doctors — Eyes Without a Face (1960)

The Doctors, inspired by the mad scientists like Frankenstein or the murderous serial killers like Dr. Giggles, is a difficult category. Most Doctor Horror falls into the visual body horror like The Human Centipede or Grotesque. We watched the 1960 French film Eyes Without a Face. The movie features a doctor whose daughter lost her face in a tragic automobile accident, forcing her to wear a mask. The doctor then seeks out young girls matching his daughter’s features to harvest their face so his daughter can, once again, be beautiful. The movie is unrated in the United States but would likely garner a PG-13 rating.

Sexual Conduct: 0/5	Violence/Gore: 3/5	Profanity: 0/5
Alcohol/Drugs: 1/5	Frightening/Intense Scenes: 3/5	Category: 1

We still have about two weeks left until Halloween. We will likely watch several more features to get us in the move. So, stay tuned for a follow up.