The Landslide

I have always loved this song. It makes me think of growing up. It makes me think of Corry and I dating, then getting married and building our lives together. When I became a mother, this song still weaved it’s way into my life as a love song to my boys. I would sing this song as I rocked my babies to sleep. In 2019, I had a scare with a suspected melanoma (good news… benign). But this song meant so much to me that I let Corry know I wanted it played at my service if my biopsy came back with bad news.

2020 brought lots of things that I had never expected. One of them was when my dad was diagnosed with Stage IV Adenocarcinoma of the lungs, with metastasis in the brain and bones.

Dad had to spend some time in the hospital in OKC after his diagnosis. My mom wasn’t able to drive at the time, because she had a grand mal seizure a few months before and hadn’t been released yet. So I was the driver for her while dad was in the hospital, and for both of them during dad’s radiation treatments. On the night that dad was released from the hospital, this song came on over the radio. I started to sing along as usual, and realized that now I was singing this song to my parents. This song took on another meaning to me in that moment. We all cried, but I kept singing through the song. After all these years, I know every word.

But every word feels a whole lot heavier now.

I’ve been afraid of changing, ’cause I’ve built my life around you. But time makes you bolder, even children get older, and I’m getting older, too.

Can I sail through the changing ocean tides? Can I handle the seasons of my life?

These lyrics hit me like a ton of bricks. Can I handle the seasons of my life? Sometimes it feels like I can’t. But I know that time will pass and things will change. After all, I am getting older, too.

8 thoughts on “The Landslide

  1. BR Stover

    Beautiful post. Oh so true that songs travel through our lives with us. Stay strong and take care.

    1. Renee

      Thank you

  2. Margaret Schwabe

    Renee, life will throw thinks at you you never dreamt of. Things you thought could never happen will happen. It will change you without you realizing it until much much later. Some times there are no answers ever. From one who knows: be true to yourself, no matter what. It will give you the strength, the courage, and the faith to weather the storms. Wishing you all the best, margaret.

    1. Renee

      Thank you, Margaret. Miss seeing you!

  3. Junette Logan

    Renee what a beautiful writing about you, your family and your parents. I pray for you all each day and wish you peace and strength as you go through these times. If I can ever do anything else for you let me know. I Love you and your family and Glenn has been help to me in many ways through the years. Thanks for the inspiration.
    Love Junette.

    1. Cris Carson

      What a beautiful blog. These seasons can be tough. Cherish every moment with your Family. Tell Glenn we love him and are praying for healing. This is his cousin Cristana.

      1. Renee

        Thank you, Cris. I will tell dad. We love you too and appreciate the prayers!

    2. Renee

      Thank you so much, Junette. Love you

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